It's been nine months since I've made a post on this blog. No, I was not busy going through pregnancy or anything else that takes nine months - just taking a nice, long break.
A couple of months ago I was talking to a friend and she told me that people come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. That saying has really stuck with me as over the past several years I've found myself struggling with friendships in one way or another. She opened my eyes to the fact that I've been trying to keep friends around for a lifetime which is just not possible or realistic. I can think of several friends who I was close to for a year or two year period, and then we just kind of drifted apart for one reason or another. Those are the "reason" or "season" people.
I find a lot of comfort in being able to somewhat classify my relationships into one of those three categories as it makes me feel less like a failure. When friendships faded or friendships failed, it ate me alive. I would ask myself, "What happened?" "What did I do wrong?" or "Why does s/he not seem to care?" I didn't (and still don't) understand the actions or attitudes of others. But now, I know that many of those people were/are not meant to be in my life forever. And that's OK.
That all said, perhaps it's more important than ever to leave a lasting, positive impression. Some people are never truly gone - I have people pop back into my life often. Sometimes we are so quick to lash out irrationally or aggressively and not take responsibility for our words or actions, and once something is done, you can't take it back. So even though someone may not be in your life forever, that's no excuse to lower your standards of behavior.
Things or possessions can fall under this reason/season/lifetime concept. I would argue that this blog came into my life for a season - mainly in 2010 and 2011. My athleticism and confidence levels were at high levels at that point and I wanted to document my journey. At this point, I don't really have a desire to give the internet details about my workouts or what I purchased at the grocery. The downfall of doing all of that was that it pushed me into disordered behavior - my workouts and eating took major priority in my life, and many times I was very cocky about it. I still hold onto a bit of that behavior, and maybe that's just me, but at least I am aware of it.
I hope everyone had a nice Christmas and enjoys the rest of 2013. It's been a good year!